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INTRODUCING ME

Tuesday, May 3, 2016

Ataraxia

 The air I breathe In and out

With a sound of doubt

Lingering throughout my ears

Saying yes, while others say no



Having to bear that pain

Day and night

Isnt easy



When I die inside

The thumping gets louder

That thumping of music

Theres a knot in my stomach



At times

When

I have no clue

What to do



The beat of the song

Calms the mind

Cant define serenity

Just a wave of emotion

Which flows out



So much pain

That

I fall

Within a heartbeat



The images

Oh, the images

Trance into my mind

Like a bright wave

Of yesterday's

Memories



Waiting in the office

Is like

Waiting for that exam result

So stressful

You want to know

But

At the same time

Your scared that

It might label you

As a failure



As I continue my journey

I long to desire

The capitative  sound

I adore



My music

Gives me peace

At mind

I zone out from

The surrounding

Learning to let go

Release my inner depth



I can never go a day

Without

Reaching for the sound

I die for

Calming my emotion

And

The stress



As soon as my name

Is called

I get that smile

The confident type of

Smile



Knowing I can rule

My emotion

It ends

As soon as

I hear that sound

So mesmerizing


Nothing else matters

Thursday, March 24, 2016

The part



Am I blind?


I can't see anymore

where we left off.


You're here,

I'm there.


A never ending story.

Continues through air.


Emotion

That kills

The heart


Looking at you

makes me die inside


Like a flower

which has no water


Dead inside


Where is that spark?


Before we part

I want to say

Your that part of me

that will never

disappear


The part that was

sacred, deep and intense


No one

And I mean


No one

can replace

the feeling you

dropped upon me


The day

you called me beautiful

and

hugged me


then vowing

your mine


Knowing one day


you would walk away 

Tuesday, March 15, 2016

Hours and days


From the day I met you until now.

It's so different;

The memories we made and the bond we retain.

And I still remember the day I was confused.

I dont remember why. 

So shy, but confident

Our bond has grown so much

As if a tree is blossoming in the spring



The root represent a base, the trunk represents trust and the leaves swaying back and forth are us



Our weird ways and craziness

How we put up with each other

We've seen the good and bad but we're still tight like a rope

Our days are countless but there are more hours to come

And nothing can tear us apart

We are strong like the air around us. 



Your gentle touch makes everything better

As if there is a raging storm in my heart but ur gentle voice blows it away

And our little jokes makes me laugh at the most odd places

No where you are or where I am

We're still so close

Our days pass by like a wave of memories

 and our hours pass by as laughter



Saturday, March 12, 2016

What do I know?



Where are you?

It's been days.

Months.

No call, nor text.

I can't laugh without,

the thought of you popping in my mind.



It's a rush of emotions hitting my face,

I don't know whether to stare or cry.

It's a force that I'm struggling with,

holding the emotion in or pulling you towards me.

And I don't know why you do this.





Without you, I die inside.

I see you everywhere, I think about you anywhere.

I see you in my dreams,

will it be okay if I say that to you the next day?

We can look intensely into each others eyes.

Who knows what will happen next?



I cry late at night and,

I don't know why but

I do.



No matter what happens,

you dont look at me the same way.

My cries for attention,

don't effect you.



Nothing I do...

No, I don't know what I do.

I did something that you used to

love



And I don't know,

why you've stopped.



I still felt the connection

that day.

I can't say

what happened because,

it wasn't a big deal.



To me, I wanted to stay with you forever.

To you, it was just a game.



And I don't know

why you let go, you could have fought.

I'm upset that you didn't.

Every night, I think of you.

Just know that.



Saturday, February 27, 2016

Not going to stay.

My mind is like a sleepless night. My heart is like a roller coaster. I stop to  think what I want and if its right. "it's complicated", I say. Is it really complicated? Or are you just scared of what will happen.  Love is a feeling that I can't get rid of when I'm with you. Hold me like I'm yours. Kiss me pretending there is a forever. No one will stay forever. Not me.

Thursday, November 12, 2015

Secrets (part 1)



Hi again, you left! But its cool. I survived. You came back and greeted me with a kiss on the cheek. It felt like things changed. Like you did. So I did. It was all laughs, hugs and kisses. You know I can't deny my love for you. 

We would get lost in each others eyes and gaze off into the moonlight as we hold each others hand. The talks about life, future & us - it just made sense. Well, didn't everything? It was like the perfect beginning to the most epic love story. 

Believe me, I tried. Was it me? Like why couldn't we make it work? I guess I was at fault when I trusted you.